More bad wine news for the PLCB

StateWays is a control state magazine, put out by the NABCA (National Alcohol Beverage Control Association) for the 17 control states to pat themselves on the back for thinking they are doing such a good job running their police-enforced monopolies (which have a guaranteed zero chance of business failure; tough to lose when you write all the rules). They also put out a yearly best wines list, and it only seemed fair to compare the PLCB's performance to their colleagues, after seeing how badly they did compared to the wine pros at Wine Spectator. 

As a first look, here's how the PLCB did last year on the StateWays Best Wines of 2015 listing. The list doesn't note if their selections are available in control states or not, but a quick check of the top two in each category shows that the Pennsylvania State Stores:

• Don't have the top 2 Malbecs
• Don't have the top 2 Sauvignon Blancs
• Do have the top Rosé, but only through SLO (minimum quantity 12 bottles!) and priced 7% higher than the magazine lists.
• Do have the #2 Rosé...in five of the 603 stores, at only 9% higher than the magazine lists.
• Don't have the top 2 American Cabernet Sauvignons
• Do have the #1 Merlot, but as SLO only (minimum quantity 12 bottles!) at 71% higher ($50 ea) than the magazine price.
• Don't have the #2 Merlot

So the PLCB stocks 1 in 10 (at 5 stores) and you can get two others if you want to pay more; sometimes a LOT more. (We're always told by the State Store Apologists that these SLO-only and allocation situations are set by the suppliers, not the PLCB. Really? Then why don't they set them for the other control states?)

This year StateWays decided just to make a straight list, not breaking it down by varietal. Let's see how the PLCB did for the top 10. Remember, these are wines selected by other control states, just like PA. The "Best Wines of 2016" list:

#10 - Valenciso Rioja Reserva 2009 ($42.95) -- Not in PA, No SLO

#9 - Bouchard Père & Fils Beaune Clos de la Mousse 2011 ($65) -- Not in PA, No SLO

#8 - Ravenswood Teldeschi Vineyard Zinfandel 2013 ($37) -- Not in PA, No SLO

#7 - Hamilton Russell Vineyards Chardonnay 2015 ($33) -- The PLCB manages to stock this one...in a whopping 3% of their stores, and look at that: at a price below list! Wow. The blind hog finds an acorn.

#6 - Dr. Konstantin Frank Rkatsiteli 2015 ($14.99) -- Not in PA, No SLO (The PLCB will try to pawn off last year's vintage for a buck over list price, though.)

#5 - Domaine Tournon Shiraz Lady’s Lane Vineyard 2012 ($60) -- Not in PA, No SLO

#4 - Domaine Sigalas Santorini Assyrtiko 2015 ($27.99) -- Another surprise: the PLCB stocks this at 5% of their stores selling for $3 under list.

#3 - Castello Banfi Florus Muscadello 2012 ($30.99 per 500 ml) -- Not in PA, No SLO (You really have to be careful when searching for this: the PLCB decided to call it just "Banfi Florus" instead of "Castello Banfi Florus." Put the "Castello" in, or just "Florus" and you won't find it, no matter what "improvements" have been done to the PLCB search engine.)

#2 - Maison Ambroise Corton Charlemage Grand Cru 2007 ($185-250.00) -- Not in PA, No SLO 

#1 - Paul Hobbs Cabernet Sauvignon Las Piedras 2012 ($278) -- Not in PA, No SLO

Equaling their insipid performance from 2015, the PLCB can only come up with a total of two selections from this control state-approved wine list this year. Still, they aren't overcharging like they did last year......or at least not yet.

So not only can't the PLCB match what the professionals pick, they can't even match what is selected by other control states. I wonder if we beat Utah, since that is one of the goals of the PLCB.

When something doesn't work, or doesn't work well, you replace it.  Pretty simple, really.

Privatize.

Can our bureaucrats pick wine? Let's see. (Part 3)

The third and last part of our yearly top 10 comparison of the PLCB's bureaucrat wine pickers to real professionals at Wine Spectator. If you missed Part 1 or Part 2, you can check them; quick recap is pretty simple — the PLCB has two of the top 9 on the shelf. One is available at 5% of their stores, the other at 10%. Not exactly stellar, but that's what the citizens in PA have come to expect. When you select for the entire state, you should be able to select the best...or you have failed. We've pretty much been living with failure in PA for 83 years.

So now it comes time to see if somehow, someway our bush-league Harrisburg cube rats managed to see the value and order the #1 wine.

Wine Spectator says:
Lewis Cabernet Sauvignon Napa Valley 2013 (MSRP: $90; cases bottled: 1,600)

Did the PLCB get it? Did they? 

Of course they didn't, are you kidding? Lewis Cabernet Sauvignon is not available here: not just this vintage, but any vintage, and no SLO either. Why would you expect otherwise? The PLCB has a history of failing to satisfy wine aficionados and the citizens in general so why would this year be any different?

But you can find it in private stores in other states, just the way you could here, if Pennsylvania were allowed to have private stores owned by people passionate about wine.

Now I understand that $90 wine isn't for everybody. In fact, that's one of the arguments the pro-PLCB types bring up: "Why do you need that $90 wine?" But when you are the only legal outlet, you have to provide for ALL wants and desires — within reason — just like the private market would. They may say, "No private store has all of these wines!" That may be correct but in the real world of retail you can go to another store that does. Anything less is failure, and we have been accepting failure for far too long.


So with a dismal record of 20%, the PLCB marches on to the beat of trying to survive at our expense, of not satisfying consumer needs, of being inconvenient and incompetent. Of being second rate, because they will never be able to lead.

I'll have some other PLCB wine info coming up and we'll see if they can come closer to the professionals...or if they remain the 1,000 monkeys typing away at 1,000 keyboards trying to replicate Shakespeare.

When something doesn't work or work well...you replace it.  Pretty simple really. Privatize.

Can our bureaucrats pick wine? Let's see. (Part 2)

Once again it is time to see if those who pick the wines that Pennsylvanians are allowed to buy agree with real wine professionals, or if we're getting second rate service from the wineocrats in Harrisburg. Wine Spectator's top picks for the year are rolling out, and as we have for several years, we're checking to see how few of them Pennsylvanians will be allowed to purchase. The PLCB managed to bat .500 for picks 10 through 7 — better than usual! — but will they be able to hold on to that average? Past history says probably not.

One of 12 different labels

The #6 wine as selected by Wine Spectator is: Orin Swift Machete California 2014 (MSRP $48: cases bottled: 15,500). You ain't gonna find any of those 15,500 cases anywhere in Pennsylvania...legally.

Wine Spectator's #5 pick is: Produttori del Barbaresco Barbaresco Asili Riserva 2011 (MSRP: $59; cases bottled: 1,100) 

While the PLCB doesn't stock this actual vintage, they do claim to be able to special order an older vintage, if you want twelve of them. Though you might have some trouble finding it: the PLCB spells it wrong in their database. Classic.

The #4 Wine Spectator pick for 2016 is Château Climens Barsac 2013 (MSRP $68; cases bottled 1,417). Much as you might like to try it, this one didn't make it into the state either.

The #3 wine as selected by Wine Spectator is Beaux Frères Pinot Noir Ribbon Ridge The Beaux Frères Vineyard 2014 (MSRP $90; cases bottled: 2,405). Sorry, no luck. Our cube rats aren't doing so well in this batch. They're 0 for 4 so far.

Wine Spectator picked this as their #2 wine of 2016: Domaine Serene Chardonnay Dundee Hills Evenstad Reserve 2014 (MSRP $55; cases bottled: 2,000). 
We'll go half a point on this one. It's not really in stock on a shelf, but they say you can order it SLO. We'll give them half a point simply because you can get it in Pennsylvania, even though the PLCB buyers have nothing to do with SLO orders since they don't select them at all. Half a point is generous.



If you're playing along at home, don't try spelling any of these correctly, like Château or Frères, as you will only confuse the hell out of the inept PLCB search engine.

So as predicted by history, the PLCB "wine specialists" score has dropped to two out of the top nine actually on the shelf, and you can maybe get one more...if you want to wait a few weeks for your SLO order.

Can they redeem themselves by having the #1 wine? Does anybody want to buy a bridge?

Can our bureaucrats pick wine? Let's see. (Part 1)

Once again it is time to see if those who are selected to pick wine for the entire state agree with real professionals, or if we are getting second rate service. Wine Spectator's top wine picks for the year are rolling out, and as we have for several years, we're checking on how many (or few) of them Pennsylvanians will be allowed to purchase.

Admittedly, wine selections are based on opinion and experience, and in the case of the PLCB, it is their opinion that you won't and aren't allowed to buy these wines (because they don't have the knowledge and experience to select them). Don't count on these vintners buying those direct shipping licenses either.

The #10 wine as selected by Wine Spectator is: Hartford Family Zinfandel Russian River Valley Old Vine 2014 (MSRP $38: cases bottled: 2,200). Surprise: the PLCB has this at 42 stores (out of 601). Rejoice: using their massive buying power as the second-largest purchaser of wine in the U.S., they are selling it at list price — oops, it can be found in the private market for up to 18% less. Of course, even if they did get a deal on it for less, you won't see that price savings, thanks to "flexible pricing!" The PLCB will just keep the difference. Don't you love it when a plan comes together?

The #9 wine as selected by Wine Spectator is: Château Smith-Haut-Lafitte Pessac-Léognan White 2013 ($106: cases bottled: 2,500). But none of that matters, because the state missed out on this one and you can't buy it here. Bummer.

The #8 wine as selected by Wine Spectator is: Antinori Toscana Tignanello 2013 ($105: cases imported: 2,500). Hey! The PLCB stocks this one too, in 5% of their stores (wonder if it's going to be marooned in Potter County?) and with a $4 discount off list. Even a blind hog finds an acorn now and then.

The #7 wine as selected by Wine Spectator is: Ridge Monte Bello Santa Cruz Mountains 2012 ($175: cases bottled: 5,243). Nope, the cube rats missed this one too, although they do have a six years older vintage that would have been around in the "let's store wine in trailers in the sun" days. 

Well, getting two out of four so far was unexpected. I'll be doing another set soon, and we'll see if they can keep up their average.